Silver Linings

11-26-12

I have been reading “Silver Lining Playbook” for the past week or so and it’s about this guy who gets out of a mental hospital. He keeps a journal of all the things he is doing after he gets out. It kind of inspired me to write again. I don’t know if it will help, but maybe it will.

He seems very out of touch with reality. He thinks that if he does all of these things that his life will get better…if he is just good enough then God will make his life better….give him his wife back and he will get better....but that’s not the way it works though is it?  

I mean it doesn’t matter what you do for God or how good you are, it doesn’t matter to him. All He cares about is your relationship with Him…that you talk to Him and come to Him.

But really…you try and get better. You work and work to try and get better, but it doesn’t really matter does it…? You can try to smile and be happy and get up and try and work and do your best to work and make it through the day, but it doesn’t really matter…you never really get better do you? I mean I haven’t….does anybody? Or is it just a series of diluted thinking that you are better and then realizing that you aren’t better. So like the only way to have a normal life is to fake it and live in a fake reality with a wall up. I don’t know.

So what is even the point of trying anymore?